What makes you think you’re so special?

I’ve been in writer forums, workshops, blogs and more, and invariably there is someone who says something like this:

“I want to write, but I’m afraid to write a bad story.”

One… no you don’t, or you’d be writing.
Two… why the hell do you think you’re so special?

Stephen King writes for years in the corner of his living room before he finally produces something worth selling. But you’re going to produce awesome prose on the first try?

Do you know how many times an author re-writes, re-vamps, throws out, and tries again… on the same project?

But you’re special. Right? Whatever comes out of your head must be perfect and wonderful the first time or you’re not going to write.

Let’s look at it from the view of an author who writes, puts out, and publishes a book, or several books. I’ve labored for hours, months, and possibly years to produce this book. I’ve tortured myself about what to write on that page, or who to kill on that page. I’ve lost sleep because of deadlines, skipped dinners, and missed out on fireworks… all to finish a novel.

And it sucked. The first draft was horrible. The second draft less so, and the third draft finally started to look like something worth publishing.

But you…. you think you should be special and everything out of your hands should be pure bliss to read?

I think it’s time for you to re-evaluate what it is that you really want. Do you want to write? If so, WRITE! That is all you can do. It will probably suck. People might laugh. So. If you are writing because that is what is inside you to do then none of that matters.

Unless you are Motzart, Pascal, Akrit Jaswal, or John von Neumann, you’re going to have to fumble and screw up just like the rest of us poor mortals.

I wasn’t a prodigy. I write. I suck sometimes. But I still pick up that keyboard and write.

What’s your excuse?

The Camera is OUT!

camera2“The Camera” is finally out.

Ever have a day when you know what you need to do, you know the process, and how you’re going to get there, but you just can’t seem to do it?
That was this book.

I knew the plot. The characters. What was said, when it was said, and who got hurt because of it. All of it. But when I sat down to put it together my mind froze. I’m not even sure that I know why.

The idea for “The Camera” actually pre-dates “The Ring”, which is the first book in this series. When I first started writing it I didn’t really know where I was going with it though, just that a boy bought a camera that actually stored things within the film, and it was going to cause him some trouble.

I had “Needful Things” in mind when I started it. Or “Friday the 13th”, or “The Room”, or “Warehouse 13″… you take your pick. They all have one thing in common. Cursed items that seem to give you what you want, but come at a price. The camera didn’t give Anthony anything he needed or wanted, it just happened to do something unexpected.

So I had this story idea, and I thought it was a good idea, but it was born during my “stress induced writers block” years, so it never went anywhere.

I wrote “The Ring” years later. It was one of those stories that just flowed out onto the page, and I think that is why it is one of my better stories. It took about five hours to get the entire story written, but I wasn’t publishing when I wrote it. I didn’t even think about it when I first started publishing, and I’m glad I didn’t. If I had, I would have put it up as a stand alone story and “Illicit Gains” would not exist.

After “Flight of the Griffins” and “Twilight Tales” were out I did an audit of all the stories in my files, and found “The Ring”, and several other stories. I started grouping them together to form books, and noticed the five stories revolving around cursed items. It was too perfect. I went back and added some foreshadowing in “The Ring”, edited it, and published it.

I thought “The Camera” would be easy to finish. I had three-quarters of it already written, and already knew what happened in the middle. Easy. Right? WRONG!

Every time I sat down to write it something would just scream “wrong” at me. The plot wasn’t right, lets tweak it. This character isn’t right. Lets tweak him. This could be worded a LOT better, tweak. Tweak. Tweak some more.

The entire plot (beyond boy finds camera, boy discover camera does something weird, boy has a horrible thing happen because of camera) changed at least four times. At first there was a thief, then there was a bully, then there was… Well lets just say that I didn’t have the true plot until I started fleshing out the 5th book in the series, “Marco”.

Those of you keeping score, I’ll actually give you the titles of all five of the stories in this series:
“The Ring”
“The Camera”
“The Scarab Necklace”
“The Pocket Watch”
“Marco”

If you read “The Ring” you’ll know who Marco is. He ties the whole series together.

Pressing publish on “The Camera” was a huge weight off my shoulders. After three weeks of saying “it’s going to be out this weekend” I finally got to say “It’s OUT”. I was starting to wonder if it ever would be.

But, this is a good thing. It means I don’t want to put out just any old crap. I want to tell a good story. Maybe there’s a missing comma, or I screwed up a homonym, but the story itself, the characters, the plot and setting, I’m proud of that. I can go back and fix the typos and polish the grammar a bit. But I can’t retract a bad story. I don’t even want to put out a story I’m not proud to call mine.

Now, ten years down the road I fully expect to hate everything I wrote and want to rewrite it. But I’m going to resist the urge. I’ll definitely be hiring a pro-editor, when I can afford it, to re-edit everything, but I won’t be changing the core story. I will let it stand as a testament to my progress because I fully expect each story to be better than the last.

Around the Web

And I need to do another “Around the Web” post, because I have a few interesting links to share, and i don’t want to forget.

Smashwords is allowing “pre-orders” of books published through them to any platform.

KDP select is adding support for Japanese, and a couple other changes.

4 real inventions inspired by SF, a video from SciShow.

Garrett Robinson put up a fantastic formatting tutorial for print and ebooks. (there are several on his website.)

Templates for all the headers, avatars, icons and backgrounds on social media.

A great example on world building with map making.

A flow chart on how to break free of writers block.

Cliche Book Covers… Don’t do these, seriously.

Watch Neil Gaiman read his book, The Graveyard Book

Neil Gaiman discusses being disappointed by books (writing or reading them.)

The Round Table Podcast is back with an episode about “The ‘Death’ of Cyberpunk”

Joanna Penn shares her experience taking a traditionally published book back to self publishing.

Charting Progress

It has been a long time since I shared my progress in writing every day, but I think it’s important, at least to me, because it is an act of accountability. I hope it also serves to inspire others to start on the journey of “writing every day”.

A few things I learned….

  • Completing a project is like coming to the edge of a cliff.
    • Once you reach the edge, where do you go? I am starting to see little ledges and paths below so that I can just continue to write on another project, but this takes practice.
  • Editing, formatting, book covers, and marketing SUCK!
    • I don’t mean they suck, as in they are terrible, I mean they suck time away from writing. Some of these things only take a few minutes a day, but editing… man that’s a time suck. At which point I write a lot less.
  • When I’m stuck, I need to switch projects for a little bit.
    • As long as I continue working on the “PRIME” project a little every day I have given myself permission to go nuts on something else, often adding 1500 words to another project in my list, or coming up with another idea for later.
  • My word count is improving!
    • The best part, that rising blue line marking “average word count” is going up and up and up, and it’s awesome! I am really close to 1000 words a day on average. If I keep this up eventually I can write a book a month instead of short stories.
  • Can’t wait for NaNoWriMo this year!

chart

 

Influences of the Past

I was talking to a fellow author today, and we started discussing authors we know and love. There are a number of them I love at the moment. Neil Gaiman, Kim Harrison, Elizabeth Hayden, Margaret Weis and Tracy Hickman… all fantastic authors with wonderful books that drew me in, and kept me reading. Kept me looking for the next book.

When I was younger my tried and true authors were Piers Anthony and Anne McCaffrey, with a little bit of Mercedes Lackey thrown in. If you caught me with a book (which you often did) eight out of ten times it would be one of these authors.

I was a voracious reader. I have read about 80% of Piers Anthony’s, and Anne McCafferey’s books (both of who are/were prolific authors. Piers Anthony is still writing to this day, and is currently writing a book through his twitter feed.)

Thinking back, I realize that my consumption of these books had a great influence on my writing. Piers Anthony especially.

I once found myself in a discussion about his books on Reddit. Now, Reddit is an odd place, and  you can find some incredibly thought provoking commentary in there. You can also find a bunch of trolls just looking to get a rise out of people. That day I just happened to meet someone who honestly didn’t like Anthony, and when she saw my comment about what a good writer he was it pushed her buttons.

Apparently some people think of Anthony as “an old pervert”. Okay, I’ll give you one, but not the other.

Yes, Anthony writes about younger girls falling in love, flirting, sex, and centaurs and mermaids with their breasts showing. He even wrote an interesting book called “Pornucopia” which is exactly what it sounds like. Does that make him a pervert? I don’t think so. Writing erotica doesn’t make you a pervert any more then enjoying sex because, you know, it feels… GOOD!

Sex is a part of the human condition. So are the subjects of body image, love, relationships, gender equality, and age of consent. Issues that he addresses in many of his books.

I kept reading his novels because they spoke about the human condition without being preachy. He often addressed race, religion, beliefs, fear, politics, and social and political issues of all kinds, throughout many of his books. But he did it in a way that even a young adult could understand. And he did it without shoving his own personal beliefs on you (even if they were sometimes pretty obvious.)

In “Race Against Time” Piers Anthony deals with the complex idea of “conformity” and how that could cause the stagnation of society and innovation. Written in 1973, it still rings true during a time when political correctness is almost crammed down our throats. We are taught from childhood to sit down, follow directions, and learn and grow just like everyone else, and if you stand out your risk punishment for being a “disturbance in class”.

I wonder if “Race Against Time” would be publishable, through traditional means, in this decade, especially if Anthony were an unknown. Some have openly called it racist because he uses race as a device to accentuate “conformists” to “individualism”, but it was never meant to be about race.

When I say that Piers Anthony influenced my writing today, I mean that if you take the time to read between the lines of my stories you will find a deeper meaning. It isn’t just about a pretty leaf, or a scarecrow, or death. There is something behind it, some deeper meaning, even if that deeper meaning is “pay attention, ask questions, think for yourself.” Especially with my “Eversword Saga“.

I only hope that I can do half as well as Anthony, and others, did.

A Trick (A free short story)

There was a little contest today for a flash fiction story about this picture. So I wrote one. Hope you enjoy it. If you do, you can vote for me by adding a +1 to it.

A Trick

“Ha, ha, Dinah, I knew we could do it,” the little fairy said, leaning back in her saddle and tapping Dinah’s sides with her heels.

Dinah mewed, unmoving. It really didn’t matter if the commands came from fae or humans, cats rarely listened to anyone unless they wanted to.

“I can’t believe she fell for it,” the fairy said. “I mean really, chasing rabbits in the glade. She’s seven, isn’t she? That’s ancient in human years.”

She leaned back, watching a dragonfly buzz by over head, a smile widening across her face.

A frown furrowed her little brow. “You don’t think Chez would ruin it, do you? I mean, it’s so perfect, a human child in the fairy hill. We can torment her for ages. But you know Chez, she likes to meddle. “

She leaned forward, scratching the kitten between the ears. “No, she couldn’t possibly do that. I mean, the last time she interfered in someone’s mischief it started a war. We couldn’t leave the under-hill for a century. The humans forgot we existed. Surely she wouldn’t do that again.”

Dinah mewed, leaning into the scratch.

“Well, well, well. What have we here?”

The fairy looked up to see a perfect set of white teeth floating above a branch. From around the teeth a fairy materialized, her wings flickering in a purple glow.

“Oh, Chez, I was just thinking about you.”

“Red, I knew you wouldn’t waste any time getting out of the under-hill.”

“It’s a beautiful day,” Red said, laying back on Dinah. “The sun is shining, and the flowers are singing. Of course I’m out here enjoying it.”

Chez leaned against the tree trunk. “And the little girl?”

“Which little girl?” Red said, blinking big eyes up at her innocently.

“So many to choose from, it’s a pity you have so little time to play with them.”

“Exactly!” Red said, snapping up to attention. “I’m glad you understand.”

“Hmmm… You know, it’s been a very long time since I’ve been a cat,” Chez said, her shape fuzzing. “I think I might like to be a cat again.”

Chez’s shape changed around her perfectly grinning teeth, shifting into the form of a cat with purple stripes.

“A Cheshire cat?”

“But of course. We all need to be something, don’t we? Why not a cat?”

“Why not indeed. What are you up to, Chez?”

“Oh, about the height of a tree branch,” she said. Her tail started unraveling into thin air. “But that will soon be rectified,” she said as her body faded. “I’ve something to attend to within the hill.”

The grin grinned down at Red, then blinked out of existence.

“She would!” Red cried, and blinked back into the fairy hill.

Around the Web

It’s long past due for an “Around the Web” list.

Here are some of the things going on around the web.

Judge says: Apple Conspired to Fix eBook Prices

Harper Lee, author of “To Kill A Mockingbird”, scammed out of her author rights, trying to get them back.

An Op-Ed piece on “state of publishing“. A very interesting read actually, and why the mega-publisher “Penguin Random House” isn’t good for readers or authors.

A great article about research showing that copyright kills books!

What Makes People Put Down a Book

TedEd talks, “If Super Powers were Real” including super speed, flight, and immortality among others.

22 Productive Tricks

7 things D&D Taught me about Storytelling

Is ANGST the secret ingredient in new adult fiction?

 

 

Letting Go

I’ve been working through a back log of old stories, trying to complete them. There are two that are complete, finished stories… and I will probably never publish them.

They aren’t horrible stories. They just don’t fit me anymore. One, “Grimalkin”, I might use as a bonus some day because I think it’s a silly little fairy tale like story, and a fun read. The other, “Contract”, is… controversial in nature.

I don’t write silly little fairy tales, for the most part. And “Contract” just isn’t as good as I would like.

I have a whole file filed with story ideas. Some times I go back to those files and read them, and they spark new and interesting ideas. Other times I wonder why the heck I’m holding onto them.

Letting go isn’t that easy. Especially when it’s something you worked hard to build or create. But knowing what is and isn’t worth pursuing is part of growing as a creator. Sure, I could say “This is done” and post the story, but what would my readers think? Would it be a good experience for them? Would they continue reading other stories?

No, probably not. So it’s best to shelve. Let it spark other ideas. But I won’t be releasing those particular stories.

If you missed it, there is a free story, “The Pretty Leaf”. It is about memories, and life long love.

Also, “Twilight Tales” will be available for free on the 21st and 22nd of this month. If you haven’t read it, grab it then. I’ll be using up the last bit of my KDP select free days for that.

Things get Tough Sometimes

I’ve had a lot of changes lately. Mostly in my attitude.

Not so long ago I wouldn’t have had enough confidence in myself to attempt self publishing one book, let alone eight. And here I am, eight finished and more on the way.

I’ve noticed other things. My tenacity is growing… the simple ability to stick to something no matter what.

Writing isn’t always easy. Sometimes it’s tough. Some days the words don’t click, or the story frustrates you. Some days you have to power through, find a voice, and go with it.

Small Bites has done a lot to encourage that tenacity. Some of the stories have been incredibly easy to write. Others incredibly hard. But I keep writing.

This last book, three science fiction stories, has been the hardest to write so far. Not because I don’t know sci-fi, but because they are all relatively new story ideas, not quite complete, requiring a but more thought then some of the others. Plus, I have lot more going on right now, and if I skip a day of writing I usually can’t write much for a while, so I try not to skip days.

On the other hand the words seem to flow so much better when I just let go and write.

Regardless, the fact that I know I can sit down and write, even if I don’t feel like it, is a valuable thing. I may not like what I write, in fact I probably won’t… but the act of writing, and fleshing out a story, is usually enough to “get me in the mood”, which is when the true story comes out.

I took a break from publishing this week so I could redo a lot of things, and get a little ahead. I reformatted the print copy of “Osiren’s Tears”, and decided that “Small Bites” would also go up as a print book.  Got most of that formated, I just need the last three stories.

I don’t know which is coming out next week, “Small Bites 4” or “the Camera”, but I hope they will both be done by friday morning so that I can publish, one, have the other for the next week, and then work on “Forgotten Ones”. Another 20-30k word book.

Really… I just love writing.

Updates all around!

The latest episode of Self Publishing Round Table: Episode 2 is now up and ready for your viewing pleasure. And I HAVE A CAMERA! So you can see me laughing, blushing, and getting flustered in recorded time. Awesome!

WATCH IT HERE!!!

My co-hosts–  Carl Sinclair |  Wade Finnegan  |  Bill Dowis  |  John Ward

Also, I have eight books up now, and a few hopefully coming soon.

comingsoon

That about sums up the updates for now. I’ll to a more in depth post later.