Author Archives: CrissyMoss

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About CrissyMoss

I've been writing as long as I can remember.

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This morning I watched “Teens React to CaptainSparklez“, and I have to admit… I’m aCaptainSparklez fan. He, along with YogsCast, are the reason I bought Minecraft, and why I come back to it more then any game I’ve ever played.

At the end of the video they asked why people might watch CaptainSparklez, and other play throughs on youtube, and most of the teens didn’t know, even those who watched them. But I know why I watch them.

I don’t watch sports, because I have no interest in watching sweaty guys running back and forth on a field/court, playing an intricate game of “keep away”.  I don’t understand all the fine rules of most sports, not because “you’re a girl”, like most people would assume, but because I didn’t grow up with sports in my home. My dad didn’t watch football, and never sat beside me cheering on his favorite team. So it doesn’t bring me any nostalgia, or happiness to watch grown men playing the game I was forced to endure during PE ever school year for three weeks.

I don’t watch much TV anymore. Not because I have some moral issue with TV, but because I remember when TV was good. When every channel made you feel something, either laughter, love, fear, or awe as you watched your favorite actors and comedians in the shows you loved. Or the documentary about going to space. Or the show with an amazing woman fighting dragons, vampires, and/or gods, and showing girls every week that there was more to life then being a house wife.

Now, TV is 80% fake reality TV. Not just fake, but they take the worst elements of our society, and parade them around for everyone to see.

Watching channels like CaptainSparklez, YogsCast, or NorthernLion give me a real look at someone. I get to watch them actually react, jump, cheer, or laugh because of something in the game I want to play.

Watching Let’s Plays is just another form of voyeurism, but it’s on my terms. It’s far more realistic. The people are people I like, and would often love to be friends with if I met them IRL.

Now, I do think Pewdiepie is half show, and half reality. I think he, like me, gets easily scared and is just more willing then I am to confront that fear. (No, I am not installing Amnesia on my PC again, F*CK THAT!) But he does ham it up for the audience. And yet he is the most subscribed channel on youtube. Because he’s an all around interesting guy.

If TV execs would stop working so hard to make reality tv interesting, and just let it be itself, or put interesting shows with good story, drama and feeling back on… we’d probably watch a little more. Especially if you stopped trying to force us to pay $70 a month to subsidize sports channels.

People love good stories! They flock to the theater to watch epic, 3 hour long narratives. They buy books in hordes, listen to tons of audio books, and still they clamor for more.

But they also crave honesty. Something, or someone they can relate to, admire, be inspired by, or just teach them more about how the world works.

It saddens me that almost all of the great science and education shows have been replaced by crap. That science fiction, one of the most inspiring genres ever, has practically disappeared.

But I still have youtube.

 

 

PS! Thank you to Simon who helped me save the post I had accidentally deleted. You are AWESOME!

I’m a WINNER! – NaNoWriMo Day 30

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winner

I finished NaNoWriMo.

Now, to be fair, I did not finish my novel. I did write 50,000 words in my novel, and technically won NaNoWriMo, but I have so much more to go in my actual novel.

In fact, I rewrote a couple chapters already, and had to toss out 10,000 words of just pure rubbish over the last month. (They still counted, and I still have more to throw out once I rewrite those sections.)

 

What I learned from NaNoWriMo!

The muse will come. Sit down, start writing, and eventually the muse will show up to. Don’t know what to write? Write that. Write about what you think might be happening. Wright about an argument between the two main characters about nothing happening. But write, and eventually the muse will show up to.

Two, I do better at 1000 words a day right now. I had to push for the last two days to break that 50,000 word goal because I simply work better, and more consistently at 1000 words a day. But I also know that the more I do that, the more I will stretch my goals and eventually next year, when NaNoWriMo comes around again I will be able to complete this challenge with a couple days left to go ( I hope).

Lastly… It is really REALLY helpful to have a family who supports you when writing. That calls you up, or texts you every day and asks how writing is going. That encourages you, and tells you that you’re awesome. That listens to you when you are having a bad day and you think everything you write sucks.

Half of what I wrote (at least) was total, utter, crap. I’m going to have to pick out the few sentences I loved, and rewrite everything else. That means going through the entire books page by page with an editors mindset, and rewriting it ALL. But it’s gong to be worth it, because I will fill in all those missing sections, and make the story even better then it started out.

In fact… what started out as a “paranormal romance” has grown. Oh, the paranormal and the romance are still there. There is also political intrigue, a church gone amuck sacrificing people to their god to keep control, curses being lifted, a harpy nest, a siren that looks like death warmed over… I’ve got it all!

And I really can’t wait to show you all, so I’ll be doing some polishing and rewriting, and hopefully in another month or two I will have a finished copy.

I think I am going to take a short break from it all, and work on my zombie story, though. I need a short breather from mermaids and curses.

Time off – NaNoWriMo Day 25

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I took a me day yesterday. That isn’t to say I didn’t write, but I didn’t write nearly as much as I was suppose to write.

My boyfriend came over, made me dinner, cleaned the house a little, and I relaxed for a little while. It was wonderful. We got to spend time together, something I’d been missing a lot of this month since he wanted to help me finish my NaNo challenge, and I was behind.

I’m still behind, though not as much as I was three days ago. I’m making steady gains. And by taking a me day yesterday and only writing 700 words instead of 2k I felt much better today. I stopped thinking about how awful my writing was, and I just wrote this morning. I rewrote a chapter and I’m much happier with it. And I have another chapter waiting for me to write it. Any easy 3k words today, which pays off for the slacking yesterday.

Do you need a day to rest? It’s late in the game, I know, but sometimes… you just need a break. It doesn’t even have to be a whole day. Maybe you just need to go watch a show, or go have a drink with a friend.

Don’t forget to take care of yourself while you’re taking care of the writing.

Mid Novel Slump – NaNoWriMo Day 21

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It is day 21 of NaNoWriMo, and day 21 of me slogging through my novel.

I think i’ve hit the mid novel slump. It’s that point when you’ve been working on the same project for some time, and your brain starts saying things like “but what if it isn’t any good?” And “I don’t know what to write.” Or my favorite: “You Suck!”

Then I start looking at sales numbers, or old comments, or anything else that reinforces my brain trying to tell me that I suck.

Let me just say… THAT’S THE WRONG THING TO DO!

Usually when I get in this funk I switch projects for a while, and then come back at it with fresh eyes. It helps cut down on the BS my brain wants to tell me. Helps me separate the ideas brewing in my head from what’s actually on the page. Gives me perspective.

I’m trying not to do that this time. Switching projects is great. It’s given me a back log of stories to pull from, and tons of ideas and fresh perspectives. See, the problem with switching projects is that it also makes it really easy just to… stop working on that project. And never finish it.

I wrote and published just over 100k words this year. But I have 350k words written, and that’s only on the stories I’m tracking. About 2/3rds of that was written in the last year.

To put it another way… I am tracking my progress on 34 short stories, 17 novellas and novels. I finished 20 short stories and 3 novellas. (Not looking good for the longer stuff). But I’ve clearly added to all of those stories over the last year. I’ve also come up with new stories to add to the list.

This isn’t even including the file I have with “ideas” that literally  has thousands of story starters, each one between 100, and 5,000 words long.

Geez, I’ve written a lot over the course of my life. But… of those thousands of stories, only a scant few are finished. That’s not a good thing if I want to make my living as a writer.

So I have made this NaNoWriMo’s goal to work on one novel… almost exclusively. I have edited and worked on a short story that I’d like to have out next month, but my main focus is “Mermaids Curse”, which is just under 30,000 words right now.

I’ve added back story, world building, characterization, descriptions, and little plot points that add to all of these… and I’m still going.

But, somethings missing, and I’m not quite sure what it is. I know much of the second half is more action oriented, with the action helping to build the relationship, and character of each person. And the first half focuses almost exclusively on the relationship of the two main characters, with one big action scene right before the split of part one and two, and the shift in characters.

Do I know if any of this will work and create a decent book? Hell no! Am I going to write it anyway? Yes. Because it’s worth it to me.

Sex and Video Games

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body_sm_ratios1On Reddit today, there was a game designer asking if his female character was sexy, but not so sexy that it was conforming to the usual female game design stereotype….  So it got me thinking.

“Sexy” is subjective. What you find sexy I might not find sexy. And what is sexy by one regions definitions will not be the same in another.

For instance, this character has the mandatory large breasts, hour glass figure, and swaying hips that western society deems “sexy”. If you go to Japan, or Brazil it won’t be the same standard. They don’t have the same stereotypical “sexy” idea of women that we do in the west.

Now, is it still perpetuating the stereotype of video games? I don’t think so, because she isn’t half naked and her figure actually has a natural curvy form, while still being close to realistic, though not quiet.

Now.. as a woman I find the whole discussion to be trivial in general. “You’re painting women as sex objects” … No, they are painting them as caricatures of the “sexy woman”. That is to say, grossly out of proportion, gravity defying, and completely unrealistic. Some of them ape superhero proportions, but many of them don’t even bother with that. If that is a man’s idea of an ideal woman then he is in for a sad awakening when he goes looking for a real one.

Advertising has done far more to paint woman as sex objects than video games ever have, and yet fem-libers will shout far louder about a woman in impractical armor in a video game then they will about the anorexic looking fashion models, and half naked women in commercials and magazines with photoshopped bodies.

A character in a video game ISN’T REAL! It isn’t even close. It doesn’t paint an idealistic picture of a woman, it paints a fake, unattainable in any circumstances woman. What’s more, it doesn’t just do this for the women, it does this for the men as well.

Women who get all irritated about video game avatars are clearly not versed in gaming and comic book culture, nor do they know anything about the historical trend of art. Both men and women were painted, drawn, sculpted, and shown in the idealized versions of the time and place they originated, and/or caricatures of those ideals. It only sometimes has something to do with sex, other times it’s just something “pretty” to look at, or commentating on society as a whole.

And if they are versed in art history, then why the hell are they so argumentative about the whole thing? Why aren’t they using it as discussion instead of just saying “DON’T DO THAT!”

Superheros are a mans power fantasy? So because I’m female I’m not allowed to have the same fantasy? I want to fantasize that I’m the sexy muscular woman with all the power under my sword, able to slice through dragons, orcs and trolls with one swing of my sword. That’s my power fantasy!

Just because you are offended at something THAT DOESN’T MAKE IT WRONG! Stop fucking up life for the rest of us just because you got your panties in a twist. Let me have my fantasy for one fricking minute, and just enjoy being beautiful, strong, and capable, even though I’m not in real life.

And really, isn’t that what a video game is all about in the first place?

A Sale – and NaNoWriMo day 14

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Amazon has their new Countdown, so I’m trying it this weekend.

“Small Bites: The Complete Collection” will be on sale for .99 cents in December 14th (because you have to scheduled a month in advance.). $1.99 on the 15th. $2.99 on the 16th, and back to normal price on the following Monday. If you haven’t read it yet, here is a great opportunity to get it. (Don’t worry, I’ll remind you about it.)

If you have read it, and haven’t written a review, I would absolutely love one. I am only a couple away from ten.

As for NaNoWriMo, I am finally starting to get into the swing of things with it. I started in a funk, trying to get through things, and forcing myself to sit down at the computer. Sometime over the last couple days I finally found a rhythm and realized.. i like this story. I like where it’s going, and I can write it.

I think last night was the break through when I decided how it was going to end. The pieces started falling together, finally, and I was able to write several chapters.

I have a better feel for the characters now, and can see where they are all coming from. It’s made the writing so much easier, and I wrote nearly 2000 words today without even thinking about it.

I am much more confident about this becoming a full novel. It’s already 20k words in, and I have so much more to write.

I don’t Wanna! – Day 10 NaNoWriMo

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Every morning I get up, I take a shower, brush my teeth, and go to work. I put on a pot of coffee to slowly sip and wake up. I greet my customers with a smile on my face, even when inside I want to run away. Go home. Slip into bed with a book and a bottle of orange juice, and forget the outside world even exists.

I don’t want to be there, but I go. I have to pay my bills, and take care of my children. This isn’t a choice, it’s a necessity. And I go, even though I don’t wanna!

This month I’m participating in NaNoWriMo. And this week… I don’t wanna. I don’t want to write. I don’t want to sit in front of the computer. I don’t want to fill in paragraph after paragraph of someone else’s life.

But I’m going to.

There are those who say you should only write when you are inspired, and I heartily disagree. Inspiration is not what gave me thirteen books, and over 100 thousand words in stories published on Amazon. Inspiration started the story, but sheer determination finished it.

I don’t want to sit in front of my computer typing. Not today. Today I want to cuddle up and play a game, or watch TV. But TV and games won’t put words on the page. And they won’t further my goal of being an author that makes my living from my writing.

So I’m going to go write. I might have to rewrite it. But I’m still going to go do it.

The Story Writes Itself- NaNoWriMo Day 8

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I’ve done a few interviews this month, and a common question is: “Are you a pantser or a plotter?”

It’s a good question. A lot of new writers struggle over this one, trying to figure out what works best for them. And in the end, that’s the real key; finding what works for you.

I am both. I write out some plots, and I know that the more detailed the plot the better writing the actual story is going to be. But while I am writing that plot out I am also writing some of the scenes, dialog especially, that will appear in the final version.

In fact a lot of my stories start with a conversation with two people concerning a person, place or thing.

But once you have your plot, and it’s marked out in detail, don’t be afraid to deviate from it. Let the story go where it wants to go. Sometimes it will just loop right back to the end. Sometimes you’ll find something was missing from the original plot. Every now and then you’ll discover an entire person missing from the plot.

This NaNoWriMo I started with a basic plot that outlined all the chapters. The first two chapters dealt with Marizza, a witch, and how she fell in love with a merman, and conceived Okira, the cursed mermaid. The novel was suppose to be about Okira, and her struggles.

As I wrote it I realized I was struggling because Marizza’s back story, and the world building, were just a little thin. So I set about exploring it one day thinking I would just add little bits to it later, but it would be just for my information.

The story didn’t want to go that way, Marizza was more important then I realized, and her story wanted to be told too. So “Mermaid’s Curse” is going to be in two parts, in one book.

At first I rebelled against this notion. It’s suppose to be a paranormal romance, and romances do not come in two parts, and they usually do not follow the lives of a mother, then a daughter. But I realized I had to let the story write itself. If I forced it to be something it wasn’t then it wouldn’t be as good a story.

The wonderful thing about being an indie author is I don’t have to conform to conventions. I don’t have an editor or publisher to answer to. I can just write the story and let it be what it wants to be.

So maybe the story is more epic fantasy then romance at times, and other times it’s more romance. The main plot of the first half is the romance developing between Marizza and a merman, and how the curse came about. The second half is about the romance between Okira and Brother Hawk, and how they defeat the kraken. In both cases there is a lot dealing with their love lives, so I’m still going with “paranormal romance” for now.

But if the story wants to be epic fantasy… well I guess that’s what it gets to be.

Stress, and day 6 of NaNoWriMo

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It doesn’t matter what goals you set for yourself… getting that new job. Asking that hot girl out. Finishing that project by such and such day…. We are all going to have distractions, all have little things that set us back, or make the job harder.

Right now, stress seems to be the biggest one for me, and my goal of finishing NaNoWriMo, or more importantly to myself, finishing a full length novel.

And the stresses aren’t major ones. My tire was flat, I had to take my daughter to pick up her glasses, my normal back aches and pains. Nothing huge, but those little stresses add up.

Sometimes it’s best to just take a day off and relax. Breathe. Read a book. Listen to some music. Go out to dinner with your significant other. Sure, you’ll fall behind on the goal for a couple hours, but you can catch up.

Even if the only break you can get is taking twenty minutes to walk away from the entire situation and just do something that has nothing to do with your goal, you will return feeling fresh and invigorated.

Yesterday I was only able to put a hand full of words on the page. It was a struggle, and I decided the better idea would be to take a break. Finish the book I’d been reading. The word count wasn’t worth the stress. Not when I could take the few hours to pull myself together, and start fresh the next day.

That means I need to write 1800 words a day to complete NaNo on time, or just have some really good high wordcount days. Either way… I’ll get there.

Ouch! and Day 3 NaNoWriMo

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Alright, fair warning. This ones going to be a little personal, and talk a bit about politics, and how it effects me personally. So if you hate politics, or just came here to hear about writing, you’re free to go.

It’s 6:30, and I just woke up with a splitting head ache, and a tingling sensation in my left hand. This isn’t unusual for me. I’ve been dealing with this issue for the last ten years. I know what will make it stop too…. A quick trip to the chiropractor for a few weeks and everything will be right as rain.

Nearest thing we can figure, it’s a slipped disk that is pinching a nerve. Not enough to do any real damage, just enough to cause the sensation of lost circulation in one arm, and severe head aches. The chiropractor sets everything back in place, and I’m good again. It’s actually been four years since I’ve had to go to the chiropractor, and I’ve only started having this issue again within the last eight months. I’ve been putting off going because of a lack of time and money. I take ibuprofen, hot baths, and try to stretch and pop everything back into place myself… but it’s taking more pills, and the stretching is working less and less.

What does this have to do with politics?

I live in the quasi area where I make too much to get public assistance with health care, but not quite enough to afford health insurance.

So a couple years ago when I had to get a root canal because my jaw was swelling with infection, I had to suffer for six months, hoping the antibiotics would do as much as possible until I could afford the surgery. Just over $1000 to have the tooth fixed, and I only had $500 in credit at the time, so I had to pay the other $500 up front.

Now, to be fair, I do usually have a little savings in case something like this happens. But at the same time my tooth was aching, my car was breaking. So I was broke, in pain, and unable to do much about it. A dentist was not on my list of things to do.

So now, with my back hurting, and causing head aches, I am loath to go to the chiropractor.

BUT! In January I finally get insurance. Thank you Obamacare.

I know there has been a lot of debate on weather or not it’s worth it, if it works, etc. etc. Well the exchange in Washington is working fine (at least was), and I got insurance that I could afford, something that I haven’t had in YEARS! But it doesn’t kick in till January, so I am patently managing my aches and pains until then.

On the NaNoWriMo front… I’m behind. Today is the 3rd day, so I have 3000 words to write today just to keep up. But today is daylight savings, and I’ve been up since 6:30, so I think I can at least get close to that 3000 words.